Getting over a breakup is tough and there is nothing you can do to make it awesome. Let's just get that out of the way. It will take time and each day will feel like hell for a while and, then, it will start getting better. You're just going to have to go through it in order to get on the other side. So, out your big girl panties on and let's go!
With three failed marriages and what seems like a million other breakups in my wake, I have become and expert at moving on and on doing do fairly quickly. The fact of the matter is that life comes at you fast, and it also passes by pretty quickly, too. So, the time you save during your mourning period is time you can use being happier, later!
The most important thing to remember and to practice is doing nothing to try and change circumstances that you really can't or shouldn't control. Do not resist the change that is happening, no matter how badly you believe the universe made a mistake. There are no mistakes, but the more we muck around in our own lives, the greater chance we have of totally fucking shit up. This is known as the path of least resistance and here's how you do it...
1. Stop: To Go Within, You'll Have to Go Without
- Get off the grid
- Change your phone number
- Give your new number to your top 5 friends and family members
- Delete social media accounts or delete their apps from your phone
- Stay away from overwhelming social situations
- Do not contact anyone associated with the issue or emotion
- Delete all contact information for anyone involved or linked to the distress
- Meditate (YouTube is a great source of free meditations)
2. Get Active and Healthy: Heal Yourself From the Inside
- Get daily exercise in order to release much needed endorphins (apps and websites can help)
- Drink a minimum of 2 liters of electrolyte/alkaline water each day
- Sleep 8 hours a night (exercise and sleeping teas will help)
- Eat comforting but healthy foods (sugars and alcohol will create highs and lows)
3. Study: Research and Seek Answers
- Religious and spiritual books
- Business magazines, books, and websites
- Travel magazines, books, and websites
- Inspiring documentaries
4. Plan: You Have Lots to Look Forward To
- Take a trip
- Get a workout buddy
- Go out with one of your top five without pressure or crowds
5. Share: Talk It Out with Your Top Five
- Call your supportive friends and family as much as you want
- Don't try to be brave; let it all out
- Your real friends won't get tired of helping you work out your emotions
These five tips are a great way to get you started on your road to healing. Overall, remember to let the chips fall where they may, to center yourself, cut out all background noise, and to rely only on the people you know for sure can support you. However, be sure to pay attention to those who refuse to support you during this difficult time. Those who seek distance when you are vulnerable need not be invited back into your life, especially not when things get better.
Feel better, my love.
New York Times best selling author, keynote speaker and workshop leader, founder of The Gorgeous Girl's Guide, Steffans Publishing Enterprises, and Karrine & Co.